Are you guys paying attention? Because we’re not supposed to miss the last five minutes of this episode, according to the promo. I just want to make sure you guys are with me to the end. Here we go…
We open where we left off…Michael is staring intently at Scylla as Pad Man makes his way down to the room with some goons. Meanwhile, Gretchen and T-Bag are in his office at GATE, waiting for Michael and the others to come up. They plan on greeting them with guns.
Oh look, it’s an ambush. Mahone, Sucre and Linc manage to disarm the goons when they enter the Scylla room. Pad Man makes some sort of comment about how “the best minds in the world built [this] security system and you almost beat it” to Michael. Clearly Pad Man has failed to realize that Michael may have the best brain in the world. So brilliant, in fact, that even something as silly as a tumor can’t stop his genius strategizing because he managed to get Pad Man AND his Scylla card to the Scylla room.
Michael reveals all six cards to Pad Man and Sucre’s all “suck it, bitch!” Well, maybe he said “suck it, General”, but you just know he was thinking “bitch”. And that’s reason # 176,494 why I love Sucre.
Meanwhile, Trishanne and Self put on a little fight for the benefit of their captors, which allows Self to escape and kill some Asian goons. Trishanne also kills Feng. There goes Gretchen’s $125 million. She’s gonna be pissed.
Mr. White introduces himself to Gretchen, who claims to be an old colleague of T-Bag’s. White spots the guns hidden under T-Bag’s desk. Gretchen, ever the pleasant guest, realizes that White is onto them and goes charging into his office with a gun. T-Bag actually protests when Gretchen first goes after White and I silently laugh, because he then tells the hostages “no one’s going to get hurt”. I’m sorry, is this the same T-Bag we know and love from Seasons 1-3? The one who killed people without remorse?
Back in the Scylla room, Michael is hooking up all six cards to the Scylla decoder. Pad Man seems shocked that he has all six cards. Really? Really?! Michael manages to use the laptop and the cards to open the Scylla machine. Looks like the gang isn’t suffering from lack of Roland. Anyways, the Scylla decoder opens up and Michael pulls out a sort of hard drive, which is apparently the real Scylla. Pad Man seems pissed, but he insists that the boys are far from safe and are going to have a hell of a time getting out of the building. The boys enter the elevator to make their escape and realize they have to take Pad Man with them (because apparently the elevator needs to be activated with his fingerprint).
Michael and the others lead Pad Man into his office, right past another one of Pad Man’s goons, who promptly calls for more security. Once inside the office, Michael calls Sara and announces that they have all the cards. He continues to suffer side effects from the tumor.
Michael takes a seat at Pad Man’s desk (snap!), observes Scylla for a few minutes and then begins to write something on a piece of paper. Sucre takes this opportunity to have a drink. Reason # 595,004 that I love Sucre. Meanwhile, the guards are mobilizing and securing the Company building.
Trishanne arrives back at GATE and sees that T-Bag and Gretchen have taken everyone hostage. Instead of calling for backup (since she admitted in the last episode that she’s never really shot anyone) she stupidly enters the room and hides. Good Lord. Who taught this girl how to be an agent? She’s going to get herself killed. One of the hostages sees Trishanne hiding behind a desk.
We see goons mobilizing around Pad Man’s office while Pad Man mentions Aldo Burrows to the brothers. He tells them to retrieve a picture from his desk. Pad Man reveals that he knew Aldo since before Linc and Michael were born. He also reveals that Aldo wasn’t a mere analyst as he told Lincoln back in Season 1. Pad Man also mentions the boys’ mother and Linc gets super-pissed while Michael looks quizzical.
Self’s boss, Herb, asks for an update on Scylla. He tells Self to go to Senator Dallow’s office to meet with the Senator and the Attorney General and to hand over Scylla.
Michael checks his watch and has another attack. Pad Man reveals that he knows a great deal about Sucre and Mahone’s families and offers them bribes, which they refuse. Michael reveals that he wants to take the Company down, but Pad Man insists that will never happen.
At the police charity lunch, a waiter spills a plate of food on Lisa Tabak. She retreats to the bathroom to clean up and Sara comes up behind her with a gun.
Pad Man tries to leave his office, but Linc stops him. Michael then gets a call and passes it onto Pad Man. Lisa tells him that Sara is holding her at gunpoint and…Pad Man is her father! Honestly, I didn’t see that coming (I thought she was an ex-lover or something like Gretchen), but there are lots of people on various message boards who called this one correctly.
Did you guys hear that Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt eloped? The greatest media whores on the planet actually got married in secret. Although, I’m sure they will be peddling the photos to any magazine that will take them.
Pad Man seems very worried about Lisa. Michael shows him what he’s been writing: a list of all the people that Pad Man killed (either directly or indirectly). It’s a pretty long list. Linc asks Pad Man to show them how to move Scylla and Pad Man announces to his goons that he will be walking the boys out.
T-Bag’s panicking over at GATE while Trishanne makes her way into White’s office. She manages to free some hostages and asks them to escape quietly, but White is a selfish bastard and takes off. Gretchen notices him and fires about 25 bullets into his torso. A firefight ensues between Trishanne (moron) and Gretchen and T-Bag. The two of them manage to walk out of the office and Trishanne follows (idiot, call for backup!). Oh wait, she asks one of the hostages to call 911. The first smart thing she did that day.
Pad Man continues to escort the boys out of the building, while Lisa tries to make nice with Sara. She says that Linc and Michael are bad men and Sara just smirks at her. One of Lisa’s guards knocks on the bathroom door but, at Sara’s urging, Lisa sends him away. I love Sara in this scene, she’s being so tough and kick ass that I can barely stand it.
T-Bag is pissed that Gretchen killed White, but she tells him he wasn’t suited to work a 9 to 5 desk job. She’s about to kill him when Trishanne arrives in the garage with a car. T-Bag runs, but Trishanne stops him and arrests him.
Pad Man wants confirmation that Lisa is being released, but Michael says she’s staying with Sara until they’re safely away. Meanwhile, Pad Man tells the boys that the Company is everywhere and Michael and the others will never see them coming. Michael is convinced that once Scylla is handed over to the authorities, the Company will lose its secrecy. As a last a*shole move, Pad Man tells the brothers that their father was really an executioner for the Company, who killed defectors. Linc looks super pissed. Now all we need is for their mother to be alive and a Company employee and Michael and Linc will come from a seriously dysfunctional family.
Back at the police lunch, Lisa’s guards are convinced that something’s fishy. They storm the washroom and find Lisa tied up and gagged in one of the stalls. She sends her guards after Sara.
The boys are in a van, driving back to HQ (presumably), checking to see if they’re being followed. Pad Man reaches Lisa and orders her to go home. Pad Man tells his goon that they need to be unpredictable, because Michael is on to their way of operating.
Michael calls Self with the news and Self is totally psyched about this turn of events. They make a plan to meet at the rendezvous point.
Michael sends Sucre and Mahone off to someplace while the brothers enter the airport. The Company manages to ground ALL flights while they follow the brothers into the airport. Michael sends a text to Mahone saying “now”. Mahone calls the police, telling them to head over to the Ontario airport (yeay, Ontario! I’m from Ontario!). The Company goons demand the bag from Michael, otherwise they’re going to kill them.
Michael hands over the knapsack to the Company goon, who stupidly doesn’t bother to make sure Scylla is inside. I’m sure Michael made a switcheroo somewhere and Scylla is safe with him. Military police, meanwhile, take the Company goon into a security room and open up the knapsack. Of course we see that Michael did remove Scylla from the bag (duh…obviously) and the goon is really pissed.
We see that Michael had given Scylla to Mahone and Sucre for safekeeping.
T-Bag is in the back of Trishanne’s car. She admits that she knew his real identity from the start. T-Bag seems nostalgic for his salesman days.
Michael delivers Scylla to Self, who hands them transfer papers. He thanks them for their hard work and takes off to deliver Scylla. He even offers to have an ambulance take Michael to the hospital.
Pad Man tells his goons that he doesn’t know what to do.
Michael and Linc are sitting on the docks back at HQ. Linc assures Michael that he’ll get through the operation fine and Mahone and Sucre are celebrating with some beers. Isn’t it nice that the boys can forgive Mahone for all the bad shit he did in earlier seasons and embrace him as one of them?
Self meets up with Trishanne and he asks about what happened to Gretchen. Self shows her Scylla and asks whether T-Bag and Gretchen talked about any other offers for Scylla. Self, you bastard….are you going to betray the team?
Linc tells Mahone that they’re even while the team continues to wait for the ambulance. Of course, Self is unreachable, because he’s busy betraying the team! Bastard!
Trishanne asks for a closer look at Scylla and Self shoots her in the chest. Ah-ha! I knew it! Bastard! T-Bag, meanwhile, looks very shocked by this turn of events.
Michael opens the envelope that Self handed them before he left. It doesn’t contain any transfer papers…only blank pages. The team looks seriously disappointed. Obviously Michael’s brain was too busy with the tumor to notice that Self was a double-crossing bastard!
Wait a minute….is the title of this episode “Selfless” an illusion to the fact that the team is now without Self?
UPDATE: Cousin Joe excitedly called me this morning to say “let the games begin, baby!!” He’s freaking ecstatic about what happens and can’t wait to see how this whole Self betrayal thing works out. Reason #884 I love Cousin Joe….he’s always so excited about PB.
Written by: Clarissa